David Cameron recently transmitted to radio 4 fans his 8 favourite records on Sue Lawley’s desert Island Discs programme. One got the overall feeling that both Sue Lawley (shortly to retire) and Cameron (shortly to ascend new heights) were both going for the subtle Oscar factor. Sue wanted to go out with a final feather in her cap with the pre-empting interview of a prime minister in waiting and Cameron wished to present himself to the general public as a man for all seasons with an emphasis on being everybody’s champion . The overall impression I received was that Cameron was slimy and insincere to the point he might well prove to be a “Blair doppelganger” if he does manage to get into power. His self presentation package came over as spurious and one couldn’t help but think “ Oh no , here we go again . Major ,Haig ,Duncan Smith and now Cameron . Well it might just be that, it could happen again. Any party who can vote for Cameron’s three predecessors has to have underlying weak foundations and a profound flaw in the core of its very existence!

I wondered how he got onto the programme at such a pivotal moment of political history in the making and just when he needed to go up the next step. However he managed it he certainly jumped the queue but I suspect that he achieved it the same way as he managed to gate crash David Beckham’s recent pre World Cup bash . By pulling some long elasticised strings that stretch from the Conservative central office to Radio four , Beckingham Place or wherever the conservative gnomes wish his to perform a publicity gimmick. His eight records were definitely gimmicky. Whilst Tony Blair was making plans to meet the pope and Prescott was squirming on the croquet lawns of his grace and favour mansion, Cameron with the help of Sue Lawley ( and presumably the BBC ) was performing a publicity stunt which he hoped would bring his percentage of the votes well into a good majority.

The conservatives have tried the working class/ lower middle class background and lost heavily in three General Elections so now they are back with the old Etonian and Oxbridge but with a very different image and style. No old money breeding, no thin blue stripe of the Eton tie to signify ones silver spoon background , no fancy hand stitched suits when canvassing votes and creating new blue popularity, open shirts , Sam instead of Samantha and a bike instead of a fancy car. In my opinion and many others, his gnome programmed image was as non representative of the real Cameron as was his 8 records.

The image of Cameron changing Nappies with the left hand as he put his bike crash helmet with his right invokes a powerful image. Like many couples they both have full time jobs its not easy to manage but it makes me wonder who does actually look after the thee children and cook the meals for the exhausted Camerons returning from the hard day’s work. Perhaps the in laws help out but it is more likely to be a nanny and perhaps others otherwise it wouldn’t be possible to maintain the family with the politics which Cameron claimed he intended doing . “ Family first, politics second ” Pull the other one Mr Cameron unless the whole thing is a charade. The Nappy image was clearly designed for the stay at home working mum ( or dad). This is part of his reluctance to allow his monied culture background to show itself so we don’t know the real David any more than we know the real Tony. David’s Desert Island Discs had to be a false selection and only one that even approached what would have been the cultured selection of the pre Thatcher Tories and I found it hard to believe that a man who had all the advantages of Eton, Balliol, and a wife connected to the Astors of Hever Castle could have possibly grown up and absorbed such a minimum amount of culture.

For those who didn’t manage to hear the programme, I will list Cameron’s choice of 8 records. No I was Bob Dylan’s “Tangled up in blue”, which would bring in the teenagers from the nineteen seventies. No 2 was “Ernie” the milkman which must have hit the recall button of the children of the sixties, No 3 was Pink Floyd “Wish you were here” for the eighties teenager and no 4th was Kiri Te Kanawa’s “On Wings of Song” ( the nearest to quality culture ) no 5 “ Fake plastic trees” by Radio Head ( an appropriate substance for David Cameron) No 6, “The Charming Man” performed by Smiths whoever they are , No 7, “ A Perfect Circle” performed by R.E.M. an acronym which escapes me and finally no 8 , “All these things that I’ve done” performed by the Killers probably the “about to vote” generation . Most definitely an eclective 8 with a effect calculation. No one believes that these are the records he would really take with him to a desert Island.

A similar image is created with his empathy with the great British drinker and the implied “ I am one of you” statement when he confessed that he relaxes and lets down in the evening with a glass (s ?) of whiskey and when Sue Lawley asked what luxury he would like to take to the Island he selected a crate of whiskey. If that is true he might well be in danger of following the same path as Charles Kennedy, erstwhile leader of the Liberal Democrats. However I can’t help feeling that a crate of Earnie’s milk would be much more acceptable and appropriate if it could be preserved properly.

Cameron let slip carefully honed information and choreographed activities but if he really gave us a true picture of himself with his Desert Island Discs he must be a very shallow person because with his silver spoon background and networking contacts he appeared to have gained negligible culture and transmits on a different wavelength from others who belong to the same privileged environment. Cameron is a slightly upmarket Blair who shares the basic Philistine concept of art and culture although Cameron upstages Blair thanks to the image created by Eton school, once the educational emporium of the aristocrats and the well bred but now a school for anyone who has the spare cash. !
David Cameron couldn’t fail to succeed .Not only did he go to Eaton and Oxford but also married into the Astors of Hever Castel who were fabulously rich, spent money like it was going out of fashion and were famous socialites for doing so. And, it was a female Astor who became the first woman MP, a significant fact. In 1917 the Astors were given a peerage presumably because they spent some of their money in the right places but it certainly wasn’t for fighting in the first world war for which they would have received medals rather than titles. All retrospective aspects but being part of the Astors would have opened doors faster than the doorman at Whites Club if the Queen turned up unexpected.

When David Cameron talked about his wife Sam and remembered his wedding as the most memorable and happiest day of his life with the tremulous voice of emotion and tears almost coming out of the radio I thought “ how far will this guy go.” I searched for an analogy which would represent what this man was all about and came up with the concept that Mr Cameron reminds me of one of those substances which are created in factories from artificial ingredients and impregnated with numerous e numbers which provides the taste of something it isn’t. Mr Cameron is the political equivalent of not being what he claims to be. The pseudo salmon steak with e – numbers providing the salmon “taste- a –like” factor.

“ Bike man” is another thing I find difficult to believe in although I am sure he wants to improve his physical image and perhaps get rid of some of that pubescent puppy cheeks and change them for a more interesting hollow cheek look that can imply a touch of wisdom.
Sue Lawley obviously wanted to have the best publicity for her programme as much as Cameron and the Conservative operatives wanted to use the programme for their own ends. She implied that Cameron was a brilliant student achieving a first in PPE although a first in three complex subjects wouldn’t be an in depth knowledge of any one of them and in the absence of sport it might simply mean that he suffered from nerdism. A degree in PPE does not produce a scholar and even attending the halls of Oxford would hardly provide a deep intellectual understanding of one subject let alone three. A superficial concept of Politics Philosophy and Economics does not produce a brilliant mind or a man walking with destiny waiting to become Prime minister.

The Editor